


Season's Greetings

by Roga



Category: Sports Night
Genre: F/M, Gen, Humor, Romantic Gestures, christmas in july
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-07-17
Updated: 2007-07-17
Packaged: 2017-12-12 23:49:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/817469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roga/pseuds/Roga
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which the boys come up with bad plans and Christmas is held in July. But hey, at least there's eggnog.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Season's Greetings

**Author's Note:**

> For [sn_playbook](http://sn-playbook.livejournal.com/)'s Christmas in July challenge, which I may have taken in an all too literal direction.

"Casey?"

Casey turned to the person standing behind him in the lunch line.

"Hey, Jeremy."

"Hi." Jeremy looked agitated. Casey wasn't worried; most days, minor agitation was Jeremy's default state. "It seems I require your services. I'm in a bit of a pickle."

"And you need a sports anchor?" he asked, smiling.

"Not exactly."

"A writer?"

"No."

"A man knowledgeable in all manner of seemingly useless but in fact highly advantageous little nuggets of trivia?"

"So much no."

Casey studied his options, finally choosing a large, plastic-encased salad for himself and a turkey sandwich for Dan. "Okay, should I keep guessing, or—"

"I need your opinions on matters of a… romantical nature."

"Romantic," Casey automatically corrected.

"I was going for the Pirates of Penzance vibe," Jeremy explained. Casey looked at him blankly. "Uh, never mind. Have I mentioned my pickle?"

"You have," he said, balancing two Diet Cokes in one hand and the food in the other. "Tell me about your pickle, Jer."

Dana, passing by, gave them look that clearly said they were freaking her out. Jeremy flushed and pulled Casey aside.

"See, the thing is, Natalie and I," he said in a low voice.

"You've broken up."

"Ha, nice guess. Actually, she broke up with me. Now, it's strictly temporary," Jeremy raised one hand as if to prove it, "she's only broken up with me until I concede that The Play was the best moment in the history of college football, which, I'm sorry, it makes for a very respectable second but as I'm sure you agree, nothing lives up to Flutie in '84, and our argument became a little bit heated, words flung ad nauseam ad Natalie-not-speaking-to-me et cetera. Now, I would normally be perfectly fine with the temporary break up routine – you know Natalie, I can wait her out, wear her down—"

" _Jeremy._ "

"—but the _thing_ is, I'm going home next week for a high school reunion and I really really want to show off my hot girlfriend," he finished, speaking very quickly.

For a long moment Casey stared at him. The he turned and started walking towards the office.

"I'm still not clear on what you need me for."

Jeremy followed at his heels. "Ah, well _here's_ the thing."

"This is the last thing? No more things will appear later?"

"No, no, ha, no, this is the thing. You see, I know what will bring Natalie around. What will most likely not only melt her very last defenses, but also lead to some fantastically good sex. Possibly even during the reunion itself."

"Okay, what is it?"

Jeremy paused dramatically. "My Christmas gift to her."

"It's not Christmas," Casey pointed out.

"Do you see my pickle?"

"In a very vague, warped kind of way."

"Simply put, if I give Natalie my Christmas gift she will consequently do the following things: one, get back together with me, two, accompany me to my reunion and three, publicly dress down Brad Garrety while flaunting her very sexy expertise in all matters sports-related to that dumb jock. But the thing is – _it's not Christmas_."

Jeremy looked positively miserable.

Casey opened the office door with an elbow, and carefully managed to set the food down on his desk without dropping anything as Jeremy settled in one of the chairs. "I'm just throwing this out there," he said, "but have you thought about, you know, apologizing?"

Jeremy waved a hand. "That's out of the question."

"Right."

"What I need," Jeremy said, his face a whole new look of passionate determination, "is a plan. A plan for how to bring about Christmas in July, without collapsing in a fit of cognitive dissonance. Which is what I need your help with."

"Help with what?" Dan inquired from the doorway, and then said, "Heads up!" and tossed Casey a tuna melt. "Got you lunch."

Casey pointed at the turkey sandwich waiting on his desk. "I got _you_ lunch."

Dan blinked. "Huh. That was unexpected. Jeremy, you want a sandwich?"

"No thanks," Jeremy said, swallowing a bite of his own lunch. "I'm good. Except for the," he nodded at Casey, "you know."

Dan popped the can of Coke and settled on the couch. "Right, I interrupted you right after 'cognitive dissonance'. Help with what?"

"Getting Natalie to rescind, or at least postpone, her strictly temporary break up with me."

"Oh, no no no no no," Dan's eyes widened, "I am not hearing this. You're asking _Casey_ for romantic advice? Now that's cognitive dissonance right there."

"Hey," Casey felt the need to say.

"No offense, Casey."

"Nonetheless, taken."

Dan ignored him in favor of bitching at Jeremy. "Seriously, Jeremy, why didn't you come to _me_? I'm wounded."

"I'm sorry, Dan, but the subject matter naturally lent itself to Casey since what it mostly concerns is, well, Christmas."

"You're not Christian."

"One of many subtle differences between my girlfriend and myself," Jeremy said.

Dan stood up and moved to sit on his desk, the way he did when he wanted to enter teaching mode. "Okay, I think you should know by now that my powers of yenta surpass gender, race, and religious denomination, so I need to be brought up to speed here."

Jeremy filled him in.

"What's the gift?" Dan asked when he was done.

Jeremy told him that too.

"My friend," Dan said, "you are not entirely unlike a thirteen year old girl."

"I have to agree," Casey said, "but it is adorable, in a way."

"A manly way?" Jeremy asked.

"Very manly," Casey assured him.

"Very bar mitzvah," Dan added.

"Thanks," Jeremy grumbled. "Now that the mocking is over, can you please help me justify having Christmas in July?"

"On it," Casey said. He flipped his legs on the couch, probing a fork in his salad in concentration. Dan drew out a legal pad and started doodling on it. Jeremy continued to munch morosely on his sandwich.

"Okay, how about this," Casey said after a while, sitting up. "You can tell her you thought it was December."

Jeremy stared disbelievingly. "I thought it was December?'

"An honest mistake."

"And I didn’t notice the blazing sunshine outside?"

"Global warming! You're a conscientious individual, you keep up."

Dan snorted. "See, this is why you never ask Casey for advice. Here's what I'm thinking: it's Christmas in Australia, in honor of which, you have decided to present Natalie with a gift."

"Actually," Jeremy said, in the tone he used when he was embarrassed for other people, "it's only _winter_ in Australia, not Christmas."

Dan considered this for a beat. "You may be correct."

"I'm certain I am."

"Okay, okay," Dan said, eyes lighting up, "how about this: Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus, right? He was born in the beginning of the year. But in the old biblical calendar the first month of the year was actually Nissan, the seventh month, and the _seventh_ month _nowadays_ is _July_."

Jeremy looked shocked. "You would abuse your own religion just like that?"

Casey shook his head, trying not to grin. "For shame, Daniel." He also managed not point out the fact that Jeremy was the one advocating Christmas in the first place.

Dan hopped down from the desk, undisturbed, tossing his sandwich wrapper into the trash basket. "I am this close to giving up on you guys. But I won't. Because I am a good friend."

"Yeah, you’re also a late friend," Dana said, leaning carelessly against the office door.

Dan's eyebrows spiked up. "You're going to have me _eliminated?_ "

"Late for rundown," she clarified, rolling her eyes. "Come on, boys."

She spun and started walking away, correctly assuming that they'd follow. "What was that all about?" she asked Casey on the way to the conference room.

"Jeremy's acting crazy because of Natalie again," he answered.

"Right here," Jeremy reminded them.

"Jeremy," Dana said, "why don't you just admit that The Play trumps Flutie's pass?"

"Ha! Never. But it's okay -- I have a plan."

"You do."

He told her about his plan. In a single moment, Dana's entire demeanor softened. "Oh, Jeremy," she said, eyes full of emotion. "That's so… you know what? I'm declaring an office Christmas party next week. Go wild."

Jeremy's eyes widened. "Really? You would do that?"

"You _can_ do that?" Casey asked.

"Hello, _boss_ here," Dana said, entirely too smugly . "I'm unpredictable, and am allowed to mess with my staff."

"There is that," Casey conceded.

"Keep you on your toes!"

"And we appreciate that you do," Jeremy said heartily.

"Besides," Dan added with cheer, "everyone thinks you're crazy anyway."

*

Which was how they ended up, one week later, with holly and mistletoe decking the halls, a giant Christmas tree in the middle of the bullpen groaning under the weight of Jeremy's handcrafted ornaments, and an almost maniacally joyful Natalie, draped around Jeremy's neck.

"So," Casey said, taking a sip of eggnog at the post-show holiday gathering, "mission accomplished?"

Jeremy grinned. "Brad Garrety is going to be so jealous, I can taste it."

Dan stopped by, clapping a hand on Jeremy's shoulder. "Natalie, you liked the tree?"

"What?" Natalie, still smiling, looked a bit startled. "Oh, the tree, sure. It was very nice."

Casey and Dan looked at each other, as Jeremy lowered his face with a guilty flush. "Nice?" Dan repeated.

"Yeah," Natalie replied absently. "I mean hey, personalized Christmas ornaments, with pictures of us and quotes and historical game scores. It's very sweet."

"Sweet," Casey stated.

"Um, yeah?"

"And yet," said Dan, "you are pleased enough to forgo the break up thing, at least."

"Of course! I mean, hello," she practically squealed, "we're going to Paris!"

Jeremy shuffled his feet.

It was Dan who finally broke the silence. "Jeremy?" he asked in a threatening tone.

Jeremy didn't look him in the face. "Well, I mean, Christmas in July? You have to admit, it's kind of ridiculous. I needed a backup gift."

"So you're taking her to Paris," Casey said.

"The French countryside, actually," Jeremy mumbled. "We're going to stalk the Tour de France."

Natalie smiled brightly. "Isn't it awesome?" she asked, squeezing Jeremy's waist.

"She made us wear _holiday ties_ , Jeremy," Dan complained.

"Mine had _reindeer_ ," Casey said pointedly. "Also, Isaac yelled at me for getting him a cheese grater. Again."

"And here I was," said Dan, "celebrating Christmas, on these days when I should be _fasting_."

"That would actually be in a month—" Jeremy said, and changed tracks at Dan's glare, "—but I see your point."

Natalie, clearly sensing her boyfriend's need for an immediate rescue from the scene, grabbed hold of his hand. "Come on, honey," she said, pulling him after her. "We gotta—yeah. Merry Christmas, guys!" she said over her shoulder.

Dan and Casey stood side by side, watching them retreat.

"So," Casey said, "France, huh."

"Looks like."

"I can't believe I'm this jealous of Natalie."

"Dude, I can't believe you actually wore that tie."

Casey glanced down at his tie, where reindeer were prancing merrily between palm trees, an old souvenir from California. "Well, what are friends for."

He raised his glass of eggnog. "Merry Christmas, Danny."

"Merry Christmas." Their glasses clinked. "And a happy Fast of Tamuz."

"That was last week."

"Okay."

"Besides, isn't it supposed to be a day of mourning?"

"Aren't you supposed to be the not Jewish one?"

Casey grinned. "Night, Danny."

"Night, Case."


End file.
